High School

Rearrange the sentence below to remove any wordy sections without changing its meaning.

Original: Shrek saves Fiona from the castle for reasons that are purely selfish.

Revised: Shrek selfishly saves Fiona from the castle.

Answer :

Final answer:

The thesis statement can be simplified to focus directly on Shrek. The revised version maintains the original meaning while removing unnecessary words. This clarity enhances the effectiveness of the statement.


Explanation:

Improving the Thesis Statement

The original sentence states, "This thesis statement is based on Disney's Shrek." To enhance clarity and remove wordiness, we can simply state the main focus on Shrek directly. This leads us to the more concise sentence: "Shrek saves Fiona for purely selfish reasons." This keeps the essential meaning intact while eliminating unnecessary wording.

Summary of Changes

  • Original: This thesis statement is based on Disney's Shrek.
  • Revised: Shrek saves Fiona for purely selfish reasons.

Learn more about thesis statement here:

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