Answer :
Final answer:
The sentence can be made concise by changing it to 'Students should be allowed to buy candy and fast food at school.' This version uses stronger verbs and eliminates unnecessary wording. Simplifying language can enhance clarity and readability.
Explanation:
Revised Sentence
The sentence can be made more concise by removing unnecessary words while maintaining its meaning. A more streamlined version would read:
Concise Version
Students should be allowed to buy candy and fast food at school.
This revision eliminates superfluous terms such as 'make purchases of' and replaces it with the stronger verb 'buy', and also changes 'in' to 'at' for further clarity.
Learn more about Sentence Revision here:
https://brainly.com/question/2997667