Answer :
Final answer:
The sentence 'Athletes who are in high school should not be allowed to commit to colleges until their senior year' can be made more concise as 'High school athletes should be prohibited from committing to colleges before their senior year.' Additional examples were provided for revising sentences for concision, avoiding first person, and using active verbs while maintaining the original meanings.
Explanation:
The original sentence 'Athletes who are in high school should not be allowed to commit to colleges until their senior year' can be made less wordy by rewriting it as 'High school athletes should be prohibited from committing to colleges before their senior year.' This preserves the original meaning while removing unnecessary words.
To revise sentences to be more concise, consider these examples:
- Original: There are many Skyline College students who want to transfer to a four-year university. Revised: Many Skyline College students aim to transfer to four-year universities.
- Original: There is a major advantage to starting your college career at a community college. Revised: Starting at a community college offers major advantages.
Furthermore, avoid using the first person unnecessarily:
- Original: Skyline College has great programs to help students get a good education, so I think local high school students should seriously consider starting their education here. Revised: Local high school students should consider Skyline College for its excellent educational programs.
Lastly, use active verbs to create more dynamic sentences:
- Original: John must maintain a 3.0 GPA so that he can transfer next Fall. Revised: John must maintain a 3.0 GPA to transfer next Fall.
- Original: Counseling 100 helps first-generation college students begin their college career. Revised: Counseling 100 assists first-generation college students with starting their college career.
Final answer:
High school athletes should not commit to colleges until their senior year.
Explanation:
Athletes in high school should not be allowed to commit to colleges until their senior year.
Learn more about Commitment of high school athletes to colleges here:
https://brainly.com/question/30073965
